Every parent dreams of having the perfect children — obedient little angels who sleep through the night, eat and use the bathroom on a schedule, and let mom and dad go about their day uninterrupted. Such children are easy to brag about. However, a disobedient child is always a challenge, and AdmiGram.com understands that you might have one of those restless little ones.
Not only is there no pride in the antics of this little troublemaker, but there’s also the shame of thinking others might see you as a bad parent because you can’t teach your child to behave properly. It’s time to understand once and for all why your child is different and always acts contrary.
Disobedient child: how parents can nurture genius
Why is your child different, and is it really a bad thing?
© Jay Hsu / Flickr
These questions and similar concerns are common among parents. Every child psychologist will tell you this. The key is to understand one simple truth: regardless of age, a child is a person. They have their own desires, needs, personality, and weaknesses.
The fact that your child is different may be a sign that they are special. You need to help them channel their energy in the right direction. Parents are there not to break the child’s spirit with prohibitions but to help them find their place in the world.
Disobedient child: how should parents behave?
© Jay Hsu / Flickr
Of course, parents need to distinguish between simple whims and motivated stubbornness. A child’s stubbornness is the first and main indicator that they are forming their own opinion, which is the foundation of personality.
Explain to your child why you think certain behaviors are unacceptable to you or others. Constantly suppressing a child’s individuality and forcing them to comply with your will is wrong. This is why developed countries that value freedom and individuality focus on fighting all forms of child punishment.
If your child likes to splash in puddles, buy them rubber boots. If they want to run barefoot through puddles, explain why they shouldn’t and get them a small inflatable pool where they can do it safely. Is that so hard?
Don’t “kill” their personality. Don’t punish them — understand why they draw on the walls, refuse to wear matching socks, or don’t want to go to dance classes. Support their initiatives: hang a large sheet of paper on the wall and teach them to draw, buy bright clothes if they want to stand out, and help them pursue singing if they prefer it over dancing.
Being like everyone else is the worst thing for a child
© Jay Hsu / Flickr
Do you want your child to be like everyone else? Do you want your child to grow up like everyone else? To be a gray mouse like everyone else? To work in an office from 9 to 6 and mow the lawn once a week? No? Then don’t hinder their development! Stubborn, disobedient, curious children often grow into remarkable adults. Such children will always have an inner strength and never become people who are “like everyone else.”
Albert Einstein almost got expelled for truancy and misbehavior. Bill Gates was nearly expelled for poor behavior and was even forced to see a psychiatrist. Steve Jobs could have become a juvenile delinquent if he hadn’t been expelled from school in the third grade.
So, before you punish your disobedient child, try to understand the root of their stubbornness. Remember, the world would be entirely different if all children were “like everyone else.” It’s the stubborn, troublesome, and sometimes uncontrollable children who achieve great things in life.
image on top: Jay Hsu / Flickr
